I loved her then but how do I love her now

In my last post I listed all the wonderful things that happened when we first started dating. But here it is 6 years later and several kids down the road. Now don't get me wrong it hasn't been the easiest journey in the world. There have been some very VERY difficult road bumps but I couldn't imagine anyone else that I would've wanted to experience them with *through eyes that started to get watery*. Jodi has been the most amazing woman I have ever meet from the moment that I started getting to know her personally. At first I was just trying to impress her and try to show her how strong I was but at the same time impress her with my intellect and how considerate I was of her feelings. But as relationships usually go I started to show her the lazy and weak side of me. I hope that she didn't feel like she didn't really know me when she said the eternal "yes". I know that she was very suprised with certain aspects of my personality that kind of felt like I had sprang on her or she felt were completely resolved. Even YEARS after we had told one another that we would be with each other for all of eternity. I know that we can both be difficult some times. But I am so grateful that the woman that lays beside me in bed every night wants me there. She wants to be next to me, even when it feels like no one else in the world would even fathom it. She has forgiven me for so much and she continues to love me and she sees me fail over and over again and she continues to love me. Even though its hard some times to want to wrap her arms around me after we both agree and resolve that there isnt anyone else that each of us would rather be with. We hold one another and continue to realize that what we are feeling together is real and tangible and it is a divine gift from god. That the love we share together is such an amazing blessing that he has bestowed upon us and through that love we have created 4 amazing and beautiful children. He has felt in his immense heart that an incredibly unworthy soul such as myself deserves to take care of his children for a short while and the best part is that he has given her to me because he knows that I couldn't do it alone and I know that she is the absolute best candidate to help me when I fall so short.
I always look at her in amazement with how strong of a person she is and how together she is when i'm a complete train wreck of a mess.
After almost 7 amazing years together she has become more beautiful and fascinating and motherly and softened and generous and kind hearted and the absolute best thing that has ever happened to me. Love takes one day at a time, one minute, one second. It is our choice as to whether we want the love to grow or to recede. It's not easy but knowing that the greatest blessing in your life will always be in your bed beside you at the end of the day will always be worth it.
I will love you from now until forever Jodi Lyn Putnam. You are my everything.

Who says you need paper to create artwork

This is what happens when we don't keep our eyes on our little ones every minute of every day. The picture on Izacks foot is a Bee on his leg is a flower, and JT is sporting a mustache. Don't they look great? Sometimes you just have to take a deep breath and realize they are only little for a little while. They have great imaginations--don't you think?

Our Boys

Jeffery Age 5: Jeffery is a very wonderful boy. He is the big brother of the group. He is always watching out for his younger brothers. He is very smart and he knows just how to push your buttons. He can be very loving but he also has a temper. Jeffery likes to play video games and he is very good at them. He also likes to play with his "sisters" the dogs (Daisy and Duke) in the back yard. He is good at making friends and wants everyone to be his friend. In fact when we went to Disneyland he talked to everyone who would listen to him.
Izack Age 4: Izack is the funniest kid. He has the best sense of humor. He loves to play the copycat game and does very well when it starts to get annoying. He likes to make up silly sayings. Right now his favorite thing to talk about is potatoes. Don't know why he just puts potato in every sentence that he says. He loves to be outside.
JT Age 2: JT is our quiet one. But don't let that full you he can and will cause trouble when you are not looking. He loves kisses and hugs. His favorite toys are Super dog and Bat dog he carries them everywhere. He loves to go outside and play with the Dogs. He will just sit down with them and let them lick him and he just giggles. He is a very happy boy. ALWAYS smiling even when he is sick. He is very curious about everything and wants to know what everything does.
Mikeal Age 1: Mikeal (Mike-al) He is a little stinker very mischievous. He has the funniest personality. His favorite things to do is stand in a semi squat and yell Hi-Ya like karate. He has to always have a toy in his hands if your sitting next to him he will give you a toy and then you have to play fight with him. He also throws the best fits. We have wood floors in the bedrooms and carpet in the front room and tv room well if he is throwing a fit in one of the carpeted rooms he will scoot on his back until he reaches either the lenolium or the wood floors and then start banging his head. I think that it is the funniest to watch him throw his fits.

A way that you will hardly see Jodi

This is what jodi looks like WITH make up on. I personally think that it makes her look hottiness and I keep trying to pester her about wearing it SOMETIME for me on special occasions but she continues to be stubborn and refuses. But thats ok I still think that she is the most amazing and beautiful girl in the history of EVER!

Why I love Jodi

When I meet Jodi many years ago the first contact I had with her was over the phone, and I thought she sounded like the most lovely woman I would meet ever. Since it was night time when I called her I wouldn't be able to meet this vision of loveliness until the next day. She was the cousin of my best friend and she was at his house at the time. So the next day I came over to the house even though my friend wasn't there just to meet her. When I saw her I realized what I felt was something that I couldn't describe so I was compelled to walk her back down to my parents house ON THE FIRST DAY SHE MET ME! While we were walking I grabbed her hand in mine, something else that I wasn't familiar with at the time and we walked hand in hand down to my families house and these undescribable emotions continued to build within me. Well she went to my house and then we went back to my friends house all the while I was loving the company that we had together and I hugged her. When our bodies connected with one another I bolt of lightening surged throughout my entire being. I knew that this girl was special. But as time progressed the feelings faded and I didn't see her for a few years. My friend was married to his wife and I anticipated seeing her again. Although the only hug that we had was the first one many years ago I once again felt a connection with her when I saw her again. During the duration of the reception I also walked with her around the outer parameter of the building and I took her alone and I wanted to kiss her. I knew I loved the feelings that I felt being around her but I didn't really do anything about them until the third meeting which took place many years later and I felt I didn't want her to slip away a third time. We didn't have any relationship but I felt like we had already meant to be with one another. I felt guilty for kissing another girl even though all we were doing for a month was talk on the phone. Something in me just wanted her and only her. So we started dating and she was kind enough to take a chance on me. The first kiss we shared with one another was a million times more amazing than our first hug. Our courtship was electrifying and every time I kiss her now its all the years and all the emotion and turmoil and love and amazement and granduer and every emotion a single being could ever imagine all rolled into one.
I have been so fortunate that god has loved me enough to give me her. There are so many times in life every single day that I look at her and think, how could I ever amount to the greatness that she posseses within her. Every time I hold her its that same hug we felt so many years ago only a million times more amazing. I love her so much and I could never fathom wanting to be with anyone but her.
I am so grateful that the two of us will have one another for eternity.
She is everything I could ever hope to be spiritually emotionally and mentally. I've known since the beginning that we shared something amazing and now every single day of our lives I am able to continue to feel that forever.
I am truly blessed.

My Hubby ROCKS

Jake and I bought the movie Enchanted and the soundtrack. And you know the song "How does she know that you love her." Well we were listening to that song on the soundtrack and I was like you never do any of those things. On Monday Jake dropped me off at work and it was a Gray day so he went across the street and bought me Yellow Roses because the sky was gray. Jake loves surprise me with things like that all the time. He is the sweetest guy I know. I honestly don't see what he sees in me because I am lame lame lame. Oh well though I love him for the person he is now and the person he will be in the future.

Cars are so overrated

So today we had to put our car in the shop because not only was the check engine light on but it was flashing at us. Jake and I thought that it was just the catalatic converter and that it would be a $500 fix, but when I told the mechanic that the engine light was flashing he said that the car needed a tune up as well. (which was an extra $100.) So needless to say we had to spend alot of money just so our car will run right and turn that dang engine light off. I guess it could be worse we could have a car payment and also have to pay for repairs so that would be the blessing. Maybe one day we will be rich enough to just dump a car when it starts having problems and buy a brandnew one. But honestly I am happy with what I got it gets us to where we need to go. And as long as I am not walking when it is freezing cold or extremly hot I am fine with putting up with a few tantrums my car decides to have.

Disneyland

We went to Disneyland March 8-16, 2008. It was so much fun. We drove down and suprisingly the boys did very well in the car. Of course we also have a DVD player in the car so they were able to watch movies the whole trip. When we left we told them that we would be there in 6 movies time so Jeff and Izack counted down the movies as we went. We left early Sat morning and got to California late Saturday afternoon. We stayed with my brother Kirtus and his wife Rebecca. They were so nice to let us take over their house for a week. The first day we were there we went to Huntington beach. The ocean was fun to play in and an amayzing site. The next three days we went to Disneyland. I was kind of disappointed myself in Disneyland, mainly because they advertise that it is the happiest place on earth but the workers there are cranky and you can't find the characters just walking around. But we did go for the kids they had fun and that is all that really matters right. On Thursday we went to Sea World and I thought that was worth the time. The animals are so beautiful and awesome. I love Sea animals anyway, so that was the highlight of my trip. Then on Friday we went back to Disneyland.

Our trip to Disneyland